A Collection of Thoughts
“Hell Bound”
We're slipping off the world that we all knew. We're whispering adieu. Poison seeps out of my tongue, curls around you like a python. The emerald of my eyes. All this injustice but I'm breathing. You can't see it but inside my heart is pulsing. Beating out my chest it's coming alive. Your mind is a labyrinth I never want to come out of. But I'm a beast like the Minotaur who belongs in the maze. I started gulping holy water, trying to save myself. Then I realized I'm closer to the devil, than God himself. You can't wonder why you're in hell if you keep dancing with the devil. Looking for the echoes of my mothers hopes as I try to close the seams. All the secrets have my skin crumbling inwards like when a star dies.
“I Wanted”
I fell I love with the idea of you. Not knowing the danger of you. I'll lend you my blood to write love letters with. I wanted to get drunk on the twinkling stars, not in the sky but in your eyes. But here I am drowning in my manmade ocean. Sulking to my death, while you sip on my pain. I can feel my world crashing down, the universe closing in. Might as well flirt with the moon, at least he'll be faithful. These harsh words written in stone, foresee my prophecy. My tears releasing the last of my pride. I'm on the brink of going psychotic, I'm failing to save myself. I'm speaking to God through prayers, failing to resurrect my old self. The forbidden galaxy swirling telling me to land, in a black hole where there's no light, that's where I stand.
Dear mother
I will avenge those tears that have dared to fall from the windows of your soul. It will become a flowing river for you in paradise, where you can acknowledge that your prayers have been answered. The fiery inferno of your heart can never be stilled with my petty apologies. The apologies that have my pitiful blood that haven't had your courage passed on to them, the apologies that contain my sorrow, my guilt, my sins which you could see through. Have i become that transparent? Have I become that consumed by the devil that I succumb to your feet and beg for your forgiveness? Will God still accept me as one of his children and still stand on the idea that I am a lovely creation? Or have I become the unworthy, selfish dolls that ponder in God's playhouse without a worry in life? Can you save me mother? Or is it too late for me to see the light
Doubt
My organ of fire desires to reach for the stars and my dreams. Instead I'll cherish my forsaken reality. I'd like to erase this prophecy, know that somewhere there's something else for me. But doubt is a noose around me, one step and I'm hanging. Cracking my hopes, splashing cold water on my fiery dreams.
